Why Does He Stare At Me So Intensely?

Are you wondering what it means when a man intensely stares at you? Does it mean he’s attracted to you, or could it mean something else? 

When a man stares at you intensely it is often a sign of attraction, it could also be a number of other things. For example, maybe he’s trying to work out if he knows you, or there’s something about your appearance that interests him.  

In this guide, we’ll explore some other reasons why a guy might stare at you so intensely – and how you can try to work out what he wants from you.  

9 Reasons Why A Man Stares At You Intensely

Here are some of the most common reasons why a man might stare at you intensely, instead of coming over and introducing himself like a normal person.

Take a look at this list, and perhaps one of these reasons might stand out as the most likely. 

He’s Trying To Catch Your Attention

A common piece of dating advice given to guys is that they should wait for a sign that a woman wants you to approach her. Perhaps a smile, a flick of the hair or extended eye contact. If a man has taken this advice to heart, he could be staring intensely at you waiting for one of these ‘indicators of interest’.

For any guys who are reading, that’s pretty lousy advice. You’ll come across as more assertive and confident if you approach a beautiful woman as soon as you see her. Often, women won’t give you indicators of interest unless you’re a super-handsome body-builder type, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible to charm them with your personality! 

He’s Waiting For ‘The Perfect Time’ To Approach You 

A lot of guys get nervous about approaching a woman they’re attracted to. They worry endlessly about how you react and what might go wrong.

These guys are prone to waiting for ‘the perfect time’ to approach a woman. Ideally, you won’t be in close proximity with any people. Even better, you’ll also have a big friendly smile on your face and won’t look busy with anything else at all. 

If you do happen to be with other people when you catch this guy staring, there’s a good chance he’s waiting for them to leave before he makes his move.   

He’s Trying To Figure Out The Right Thing To Say

For whatever reason, a lot of guys have the idea that it’s not good enough to approach you, introduce themselves and tell you that you look nice today.

Instead, they hesitate and stress themselves out trying to figure out the perfect thing to say to you.

Most likely, these guys want to make the approach seem as natural and spontaneous as possible, even if they’ve been staring at you thinking about doing it for 10 minutes or more. 

So, if he seems to me staring at you somewhat intensely, he might be looking for something unique about your appearance that he can comment on.

He’s Fantasising About You

There’s every chance that this man is attracted to you, but has no intentions of actually walking over and talking to you.

Perhaps his self-esteem is so low – or his anxiety is so high – that the idea of chatting you up isn’t even in his reality.

Maybe he has a girlfriend already, or he’s due to meet up with his boss in less than a minute, in which case it would be highly inappropriate to run over to you and start a conversation.

In any of these situations, a guy might choose to stare intensely and fantasize of what might have happened if he did actually start a conversation.   

He Thinks He Recognizes You

Have you ever seen someone that you think you know, but you’re not quite sure it’s them? This can be really frustrating!

Perhaps if he knew 100% that you were that person, he’d be excited to walk over and say something! But the potential embarrassment of it being a mistaken identity stops him from doing so.

In this case, he may be staring intensely at you trying to figure out if he knows you or not.

Someone Else Is Talking About You    

Maybe his friend started talking about you or he overheard someone else make a comment.

In this instance, it’s natural for him to stare at you to see for himself what that person was talking about. 

If he’s not sure you’re the person being mentioned, it’s natural for his stares to come off as a bit intense.  

There’s Something Unique About Your Appearance That Has Caught His Interest

Do you have a wacky hairstyle, a funny t-shirt or a unique appearance? If so, there’s every chance that something about it has caught his attention.

Could he be trying to read your t-shirt? Maybe. Is he fascinated by how your beehive haircut is withstanding the laws of gravity? Potentially. Is he drawn to your fancy earrings like a moth to a light? It’s possible.

Essentially, there’s a chance he’s interested in your appearance, but not attracted to you.   

He’s A Creepy Guy Who’s Up To No Good

When a man is staring intensely at a woman, it is often her first assumption that he’s a creepy guy that is up to no good.

And they’re well within their rights to make these presumptions. As humans, it is important for us to consider our personal safety before anything else.

For the men reading, that’s another reason to approach straight away. By actually talking to her, you can show that you’re not a friendly and cool guy, not a rapist or a serial killer.  

Anyway, the proportion of men who are staring at women because they’re planning to rob or hurt them is incredibly low.

But there are some creeps out there. So, it would be naive not to include this possibility on our list. Stay safe out there, ladies! 

It Could Actually Be Nothing At All

We all live in a world where we’re the main character. When we spot someone staring, we naturally assume they’re having all these deep and complicated thoughts about us.

But, it’s actually pretty likely they’re staring into space and not considering our presence at all.

Final Thoughts

It’s pretty unsettling when a man stares at you intensely, and there’s little wonder that it makes you wonder what he wants. Does he want to ask you on a date? Does he want to chop you up into tiny pieces? It’s natural to have these thoughts. 

However, in most cases, it’s something nowhere near as extreme as this. So, until he actually does find the courage to approach you, it’s not worth paying too much attention to these strangers at all.

Save your mental energy for things that actually matter.