My Girlfriend Cheated On Me 

If your girlfriend cheated on you and it feels like you’ll never get over the pain, please read this article carefully. 

If your girlfriend cheated on you the key is to use the emotional leverage from this pain to level up in life and attract a better woman. Once you do, you’ll begin to see this tragedy as a blessing in disguise.

In this article, you’ll find a step-by-step guide to overcome the pain of being cheated on – and use it as inspiration to improve in all areas of your life.    

A Crucial First Step Is to Accept Your Pain

Break-ups are universally painful. It’s not weak or unmasculine to admit that you feel hurt in the aftermath of this betrayal. 

In fact, this is a crucial first step to getting over your pain.

If you resist your pain, it’ll remain inside you. You’ll carry it as trauma energy and it’s likely to affect your relationships with those closest to you.    

A great start is to let out your emotions. Maybe this requires a day of crying in your bedroom, or 12 intense rounds on the punching bag while screaming. People tend to process their emotions in different ways, so do whatever feels right to you.  

It’ll also help to accept that you’re not going to feel like yourself for a while – and that this is fine.   

You might want to journal about the emotions that you are feeling in this moment, and perhaps those you might feel in the future. It can also be great to confide in close friends about these emotions, rather than keeping them bottled up to yourself. 

By identifying them now, it becomes easier to prevent them from overwhelming you in the future. What you resist persists, what you embrace dissolves.

How To Deal With Trust Issues

A great tragedy of infidelity is when it ruins the future relationships of the betrayed lover. This is sadly all too common. When we suffer from a traumatic experience, we often become overly defensive to protect ourselves from having to deal with that painful experience again.

In the case of a romantic betrayal, the trauma often causes scorned lovers to have no trust in their new partners. Perhaps they become overly paranoid that their partner is cheating or planning to cheat on them, even when this person has objectively done nothing to spark these suspicions.

In cases of extreme trauma which hasn’t been dealt with, the scorned lover might unconsciously sabotage their new relationships before they have the chance to develop strong feelings, because they associate these feelings with the potential to be hurt. You’ll often see victims of cheating go on to only seek dirtbags or partners with their own commitment issues, because they know there’s no danger of falling in love with these archetypes.

You have to get over these trust issues if you want any chance of another serious relationship blossoming.

It’s great to understand how scorned lovers self-sabotage, because this gives you a chance to recognize the motive of your behavior before it’s too late. 

It can also be a good idea to let your partner know that you were hurt in the past, and how you tend to react to it. A partner who really cares will understand and try to help you through your moments of weakness. 

Other than that, all you can do is take small steps to begin trusting your new partners. It’s hard to open up and make yourself vulnerable like this after you’ve been burned in the past, but this is the only real way to find true love again. You’ve got to go all-in to win the game of love.   

Using Emotional Leverage To Level Up In Life

While in your relationship, you might have had daydreams of your ambitions to level up physically, financially and socially. But, were you really going all out to achieve these goals? Or were they just daydreams that would be nice to have ‘one day’?

When you’re in a loving relationship with a woman who accepts you for who you are, it’s difficult to find the motivation to level up. Most likely, you’re already getting regular sex with a woman you’re attracted to, and this is one of the biggest success motivators for red-blooded men.

What’s more, you were probably spending a lot of your free time with your partner, rather than hustling on the activities that would make you more successful.

When things are going well or even just OK, most people struggle to find the emotional leverage required to make drastic improvements in their life. It’s only when things are going dreadfully that they really feel that fire up their ass.

So, if you’re really hurting from being cheated on, this could prove to be a blessing. Perhaps now, you’re really feeling that burning desire to make a change in your life.

Whether you’re desperate to get a hotter girlfriend or just to show your ex that she was wrong to betray you, use this emotional leverage to your advantage. You might never feel this level of motivation again. 

Take this time to write down some goals. What do you want to achieve in the next month, six months, six years? 

  • Do you want to get in the best shape of your life?
  • Do you want to finally start dating your favorite ‘type’ of woman? 
  • Would you like to start your own business? 
  • Perhaps you want to turn your passion into an occupation?  
  • Or save up enough money to travel the world?

Whatever it is, now is the best time to start.

If anything, it’ll at least help to keep you dwelling on the pain of the break-up for too long. And, if you keep at it for long enough to build some momentum, you could really change your life in an incredible way.

At this point, you’ll surely see the betrayal from your ex-girlfriend as one of the best things that ever happened to you.   

How to Ease Back Into Dating After Being Cheated On

The idea of getting ‘back on the horse’ after being cheated on can be overwhelming.

Not only do you have to handle this betrayal, but you also have to deal with awkward first dates and being rejected by new women!? That’s a horrible attitude but a lot of men will adopt it, especially if they didn’t have much success with women before their previous relationship.

The truth is: going out and finding new women to date will help you heal, as long as you’re doing the inner work alongside it. There’s nothing like dating an objectively better woman to help you get over your ex-girlfriend. 

If the idea of approaching women after becoming newly single fills you with anxiety, check out this guide on overcoming a break-up. It’s packed with tips to help you enjoy singledom, improve your ‘game’ and succeed with the opposite sex.     

You should also use this break-up as an opportunity to spend more time with the friends and family members that make you truly happy. Perhaps you weren’t hanging out with them as much as you’d like during your relationship. 

On top of that, take some time to embrace the hobbies and passion that fill you with joy. That’s another great step to help you enjoy your newfound singlehood. It’s certainly a better plan than moping around the house and crying.     

Should You Take Your Cheating Girlfriend Back?

Absolutely not! No man with any self-respect would accept this from their life partner.

Cheating is the ultimate act of disrespect in a relationship. If you take your woman back after this, she’ll know she can probably get away with anything. Don’t be surprised if she cheats again.

Have the self-belief to know that you can attract a woman who respects you and treats you properly.  

Final Thoughts

This healing process isn’t easy after being cheated on. You can either let this incident ruin the rest of your life, or give you the motivation to improve it beyond recognition. That choice really is up to you. 

Perhaps it’ll take a good while to start feeling like your old self. But the steps outlined in this guide will help you to heal and prevent trauma from ruining your future relationships.

Every hero has struggles to overcome at some point in their story – and I know you’re strong enough to do the same. This is the first chapter of the rest of your life.