Here’s the expert opinion on what you should do when your feelings for a guy scare you.
First, you need to understand why your feelings for a man scare you. If you’re scared of being heartbroken, you need to be brave and pursue this man. If you’re scared of your life getting worse because he’s a toxic guy, cut him out of your life.
We will explore the basic reasoning behind this rule in the guide below.
If You’re Scared Of Heartbreak…
It’s always a bit scary to develop a crush.
On one hand, you might be excited to pursue this man. On the other, you know there’s a real chance of having your heart broken. And if you’ve suffered with a broken heart, you know it HURTS.
Still, deep down, you know the right thing to do.
Dive into love. Explore where this connection can lead you. Fortune favors the brave.
If we all ran away every time we got scared of heartbreak, no one would ever find true love.
Let’s expand on that thought even further…if we all aborted a mission every time we were scared of things not going our way, no one would ever achieve something truly awesome.
Yes, there is a smart way for a woman to make her interest known. By all means, give him space to chase you. But, please know: if you play too hard to get, you could ruin your chances with a great guy.
If You’re Scared Because He’s A Bad Man…
There are other reasons for you to be scared of your feelings for a man.
Perhaps you’re scared because you logically know this man is bad news for your future. Your heart says YES, but your head says: “Girl, are you crazy!”
Maybe this man is a criminal. Perhaps he’s a serial cheater. Could it be that he’s been abusive to you in the past?
These are all logical reasons to be scared. Sometimes, fear is a good thing because it protects us from truly dangerous situations.
You might rationalize why it’s OK to keep dating bad guys. If so, it’s worth taking some time to understand why you do this. A therapist can really help here. There are some great therapy apps available on iOS and Android. Indeed, therapy is easier than ever to access and is nothing to be ashamed of.
Suzanne Venker’s book ‘Women Who Win At Love’ dives deep into why women constantly chase men who are wrong from them. You can buy it on Amazon in e-book or paperback format. I recommend it all the time, because it does such a great job of explaining the harsh truths of what great men really want.
If You’re Scared Because You’re In A Relationship…
The right thing to do in this situation is to cut this guy out of your life.
Alternatively, you can explore what’s making you favor this guy over your partner. What do you think this guy brings that your current relationship doesn’t? Can you use this information to improve your current relationship? Once again, this is a great discussion to have with your therapist.
Either way, the fact you’re scared of your feelings suggests you’re probably not ready to bail on your current relationship just yet.
Final Thoughts
Your rationalizations might say you’re just scared of heartbreak, when you’re really worried that he’s a bad man. Or it might be the opposite way around.
But, deep down, you know what’s scaring you and you know what to do. This guide has helped to confirm it for you.
Best of luck!
Im Joe, and I travel the world working as a dating expert, confidence coach, and writer. I have written articles for the web’s most popular dating advice blogs and published two well-received books on dating and relationships. The Thrill Of The Chase is one of the books i’ve written.