My Boyfriend Is Ignoring Me

If you are you wondering why your boyfriend is ignoring you and how to react, you are in the right place.

Your boyfriend could be ignoring you for a couple of reasons. You might think he’s upset with you, but this isn’t always accurate. He could be really busy, having a bad day or feeling overwhelmed with attention. Either way, it’s best to calmly tell him how it makes you feel.

Below, we’ll take a closer look at the reasons why your boyfriend might choose to ignore you and how you can rectify the situation. 

The Most Common Reasons Your Boyfriend Might Ignore You

Here are 6 common reasons why a man could decide to ignore his partner for a lengthy amount of time.  

He Hasn’t Checked His Phone 

This is more possible than you might realize.

Yes, we now live in an era where everyone is expected to be checking their smartphones regularly throughout the day.  

Indeed, if someone doesn’t reply to our text within 24 hours, it can lead to feelings of rejection especially if we were ‘left on read’.

However, in reality: a lot of men are making conscious efforts to not spend as much time on their phones.

The harmful mental health effects of constant smartphone use are becoming more well-known. If nothing else, it’s a horrible drain on productivity. So, if your boyfriend is a hustler in the workplace or with an important side-project, it’s even more likely he’s trying to stay away from his phone for extended periods of time. 

So, how long has it actually been since this guy contacted you? Is it possible you’re pressing the panic button a little too early? 

He’s Upset With You 

It’s not so healthy to ignore your partner when you’re upset with them. It’s better to talk it through. But, perhaps he’s not ready for this conversation yet. It could be that he wants time to get his thoughts together.

Or maybe he wants to ‘punish’ you by making you worry about him. Again, this is not a healthy way to deal with conflict, but it does happen.  

He’s Having A Rough Day

Some people deal with a rough day by closing themselves off to other people. They just want time to themselves, rather than having to face the world.

It might upset you that he doesn’t feel able to come to you to heal from his bad day, but perhaps he just needs time. A lot of men don’t feel comfortable being vulnerable around their partner, especially early on in a relationship.

All you can really do in this situation is leave him a text saying you’re there for him when he’s ready to talk. Do this and he’ll come around eventually.  

He’s Playing Mind Games

This is another unhealthy reason for your man to be ignoring you – and it stems from his insecurities in his relationship.

The ‘mind games’ of ignoring each other’s texts – to appear less interested in each other than you really are – are commonplace when you’re not in an official relationship yet. Most men are especially aware that playing ‘hard to get’ tends to make women chase them more.

These silly games should come to an end once you’re in a relationship, but insecure guys might keep up the charade even when they’re your boyfriend. It’s common for men to do this when they believe they’re not enough for their girlfriend.

It’ll be tough to get your boyfriend to admit he’s doing this, but it’s in your best interests to convince him he doesn’t need to. The more affection you show to him, the less he’ll feel the need to act this way.  

You’re Overwhelming Him

A lot of guys don’t like to spend hours on their phone gossiping with their friends. So, if you’re sending him several texts per day about unimportant smalltalk, he may begin to feel a bit overwhelmed.

Rather than risking upsetting you by telling you he feels this way, he might opt to ignore your messages for a few days. This is his way of ‘training’ you to text him less without having to have an awkward conversation about it. 

He’s Cheating On You

This might have been the first thought that popped up in your head when you realized that your boyfriend seems to be ignoring your efforts to get in contact. For a lot of reasons, our minds jump to the worst-case scenario in situations like this, even if only for a few moments.

Of course, it’s possible that he’s ignoring your calls and messages because he’s too busy plowing some other woman.

However, unless you have more solid evidence that he’s a cheating scumbag, this is probably the least likely explanation for a man ignoring his girlfriend.

If you’re accusing him of cheating without any evidence, this is probably going to cause conflict in your relationship. Few men want to date a paranoid insecure woman, and that’s what you’re going to come off as when making these accusations based on nothing but a few ignored texts. 

If everything is otherwise great in your relationship, there’s probably a more innocent explanation.

If he’s a smart guy who doesn’t want to get caught cheating, he’d probably take extra care to respond to your messages before and after the act.   

How To Respond If Your Boyfriend Is Ignoring You

Communication is the key here.

If you’re feeling hurt by the lack of attention from your partner, it’s no good ignoring these feelings. This will only lead to them building up and up until you explode. It’s better to address them now in a calm manner.

If you don’t, he might continue to ‘ignore’ you, without even realizing that he’s upsetting you. Guys aren’t the best mind-readers, you know!

So, sit him down and calmly explain how it makes you feel when he doesn’t answer your texts quickly.    

Don’t blame him or get angry. Focus the conversation on how the behavior makes you feel. Then, hopefully you’ll be able to agree on a new way of going about things so that you can stop feeling like this. 

If he’s super busy (or upset/overwhelmed), perhaps he can send you a quick text explaining that – and that he’ll text you later.

This transparency should help you to stop stressing over why your boyfriend is ignoring you. That’ll hopefully do a lot to calm any fears you have surrounding this part of your relationship.   

Don’t Ignore Your Boyfriend Either!

It’s completely understandable that you don’t like being ignored by your boyfriend. Maybe it makes you feel small and unimportant. Perhaps it makes you paranoid about your relationship. This is completely normal.

Hopefully, the advice above will stop your boyfriend from ignoring you, so you can feel better about the relationship you’re in. 

But, it’s important that you don’t ignore him either! If you do, he’s going to feel these exact same frustrations towards you – and you don’t want that, right?

If you two set rules about quick communication to help stop you from feeling ignored, they should apply to both of you! 

Final Thoughts

It can be upsetting when your boyfriend ignores you. 

A lot of these feelings stem from not knowing why you’re being ignored. 

Hopefully, this guide will make it easier to understand why this is happening and how to eliminate this confusion from your relationship.