An ideal coffee date should last around 30 minutes to 2 hours. If there is chemistry and attraction the date will probably last in the 2-hour range. But if the spark just isn’t there the date will most likely last in the 30-minute range instead.
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How long should a coffee date last more in-depth?
As mentioned briefly above a coffee date should take about 30 minutes to 2 hours or so. However, the final decision is up to you. If you enjoy the company you can always extend the date to accommodate additional activity such as having dinner or going out to watch a movie, etc. At times the feeling might not be mutual and if there’s no chemistry it would make perfect sense to bail out but in a friendly and gentle way.
However, there’s still an active debate on how long a date, particularly a coffee date should last. Some claim that 30 minutes is an adequate time while others prefer a two-hour time limit.
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Below are some valuable tips and guidelines to help you decide how long your date should last.
Stay long enough to get to know each other better.
The date should flow and not be overly limited to time constraints. If the chemistry is right there’s no need to become hasty and time conscious. Dates should give you ample time to learn about your partner. But again, if the date doesn’t impress you it would be appropriate to call it off before things get way out of hand. It is also important to give your date a fair chance to get to know you better so don’t judge your date too fast.
Dates are supposed to be engaging, fun, and interactive. However, we are not in control of our hearts and chemistry may fail to build up. The setting and mood may be right but the chemistry may just not be there. If the vibe doesn’t flow and it seems like the conversation is forced then it’s alright to bail out early enough. Just be frank with your date and relay what you feel about the whole date thing.
Don’t overkill your time together.
If it’s your first date and the chemistry is on point the date will probably last a little longer. But it’s important to not overkill your time together since you need to save some conversation topics for the second date.
if you reveal too much about yourself and have nothing to talk about, it can ruin your second date.
Select an ideal location.
The most important features when choosing a suitable place to drink coffee are location, spatial dynamics, and emotions. The location should be very simple. Choose a location that is relatively easy for both of you to get to. If you don’t enjoy traveling, choose the closest one that suits both of you.
Also, choose somewhere that is not overly busy and loud so that you get to interact in a relatively quiet environment where you can speak freely. It would be good to choose a cafe where people are busy sipping on their coffee and working on their laptops. Cafes located next to the train tracks are probably not the best idea. Also, choose a place where both of you feel comfortable. Perhaps the most important factor in your choice is the spatial dynamics of the cafe.
Always confirm you’ll attend the date.
It’s basic etiquette to always confirm that you purpose to attend the coffee date. In case of unexpected changes, it would also be courteous to let your date know of the change of plans. You can reschedule or try to fix the date some other time along the day depending on your date’s availability. Broken communication is not a good start for a potential relationship. If you’ll be running make sure to alert your partner so they don’t wait for you wondering if you might have bailed out already.
Show up early.
Showing up early has its fair share of benefits and it is also important. You’ll get a better opportunity to pick a favorable and ideal spot that will serve your needs as you prepare to meet your date. It would be an awkward coffee date if you’ll have to stand the entire time due to traffic. Additionally, people who get nervous about their dates will have ample time to recollect and forge the courage to meet their dates. You can take your position and take a few deep breaths.
Who should buy the drink?
The issue when it comes to paying for the drinks is highly contested and people defer on who should cater for the bills. It’s a display of affection and responsibility when the man pays for the drinks. However, since it’s a free world anybody can volunteer to pay for the drinks. It’s always a nice gesture and you may also decide to create a routine that one pays for the drinks and the next will cater for the next bill.
Now do the date
Once you’ve met with your date order the coffee and spark a meaningful conversation. Start small. You could ask questions like where they are from, what are some of the goals they would like to achieve in a relationship? And what are some of the fun activities they like to engage in? That’s a good place to start. Avoid family and deep talk about relationships. If they don’t freely offer this information, try not to dig too deep. These conversations are often more sensitive than information sharing.
Finally, don’t expect anything too sexy. First dates are sexually explicit, but often not. Some coffee dates may end with a kiss or more but that’s not very usual. Once the date is about to end you can schedule a second date to continue getting to know each other some other time. But If you fail to develop chemistry say it but in a friendly way. Otherwise, you might hurt the other person’s feelings and that’s something you want to avoid.
Coffee dates are great. They are simple yet so effective for a first date. A Coffee date should last anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours but it’s up to you to make the decision. Chose a place where you can talk without getting disturbed by a lot of noise. Show up early and schedule a second date as fast as possible if there is chemistry between the two of you.
My name is Elias and I’m very interested in everything that has to do with dating and relationships. Writing has always been a big passion of mine and being able to write about what I love feels truly amazing. I have studied economics at Polhemskolan in Lund but now I’m more focused on learning more about dating and relationships.